Myth: Modesty is Mostly about Sexuality

The subject of 'modesty' is brought up quite often in Evangelical circles. I remember that a church I attended spent an entire summer teaching women about 'modesty', mostly to women who already were wearing dresses that reached close to their ankles. And a Christian university taught women to only eat a banana with a knife and fork to avoid causing men to think blow jobs. This is absurd since eating a banana that way is counter productive and causes people to think of that who otherwise might not have. This same university has a major problem with numerous cases of rape. And sadly, at times the women who are raped are the ones who are punished!

            Does the Bible refer to the subject of modesty anywhere near as much as many Evangelical churches do? There is only 1 verse in the New Testament which refers directly to the 'modesty' of women: 1 Timothy 2:9 (perhaps also 1 Peter 3:3-5 in an indirect way). But even this verse or verses have little to do with modesty in the sense of 'not displaying sexuality'. Instead, they refer more so to modesty in the sense of being adorned with humbleness and moderation. Modesty in the sense of humility and moderation, is both the primary meaning of the English and more importantly the Greek word used here. And the context of these verses support that concept.

                1 Timothy 2:9 says 'in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing'. In 1 Timothy 2:9 variants of the Greek word 'Kosmos' are used and translated by 'adorn' and 'modest'. Kosmos has the idea of order (arrangement) and is translated as 'world' in other places. The idea here is that women are to 'adorn themselves' (arrange themselves, order themselves) with 'modest' (ordered, arranged) clothing; plus they are to adorn themselves with 'propriety and moderation'. 'Propriety' is the Greek word aidous and 'moderation' is from 'sophrosunes'. From reading this verse one can see that the idea is not so much sexuality but humility. It says 'not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing'. Plus the other Greek words contain the idea of humility and limitation. Aidous refers to humility and sophrosunes refers to self control. Aidous does not have the idea in itself of 'not showing sexual beauty'. The word was even used by Plutarch in reference to scantily clothed/naked Spartan women: 'Nor was there anything disgraceful in this scant clothing of the maidens, for modesty attended them and wantoness was banished; nay, rather, it produced in them habits of simplicity' (See Plutarch The Life of Lycurgus 14; this can be viewed online in English at: http://penelope.uchicago.edu/Thayer/E/Roman/Texts/Plutarch/Lives/Lycurgus*.html and the Greek text with French translation at: http://remacle.org/bloodwolf/historiens/Plutarque/lycurgue.htm.              Kosmios is also used in 1 Timothy 3:2 in reference to male Bishops. In this passage the word is not used in the sense of 'modesty' in regard to sexuality but is translated 'of good behavior' and in Darby;s Bible as 'decorous'. Besides this, these 2 words are not used elsewhere in the New Testament. According to Greek scholars Kosmios means 'well-arranged' (Thayer's Lexicon), 'orderly, well-arranged, decent, modest (akin to kosmos, in its primary sense of "harmonious arrangement adornement"''(Vine's Dictionary). And according to Greek scholars aidos means 'a sense of shame' (Liddel and Scott Lexicon Lexicon).

                In light of the meaning of Greek words and the context, modesty in 1 Timothy 2:9 is about adorning one-self with humility, self control, and good works ('but with good deeds' 1 Timothy 2:10 NIV).  The passage in 1 Peter 3 has a similar meaning. Thus, 1 Timothy 2:9 is not really about avoiding appearing sexually attractive to men. It is ironic how many American Christian women who preach about modesty will themselves wear 'braided hair, gold, pearls, and costly clothing' which this passage directly mentions not to wear. These women condemn other women for wearing a skirt that is short yet neglect the things mentioned in this passage (some which may not even need to be applied in today's culture). Too often Christians make such a big deal out of 'modesty' yet fail to see what the only 1-2 passages on this subject actually teach. This issue is not so much what clothing or jewelry a woman wears but rather adorning herself with good works. This passage is merely suggesting the appropriate outward adornment for a godly woman. This passage suggests adornment that reflects humility, godliness, and orderliness. Reflecting these things could well mean in certain cultures that a woman should avoid appearing sexually attractive, but that is not the primary point in this passage. Also, what makes a woman sexually attractive not only changes from culture to culture but from man to man. Thus, making it nearly impossible for a woman to avoid being sexually attractive to all people. Instead of being obsessed with sex/sexuality (as many in repressed conservative Christian circles are), we should rather focus on living ordered and godly lives in humility. Let's stop laying impossible burdens and guilt on women and telling them how to dress themselves.